The Shopping List Compendium and Collection

Shopping List Compendium on CBBC

2007-09-30T11:53:00.001+01:00

The eBay Experiment

2006-10-01T20:35:00.000+01:00

Huds601, a chap on a forum I can sometimes be found on, has decided on a Christmassy shopping challenge, and I thought people who visited the Compendium would be interested.

From his site:

I plan on buying EVERYTHING I need for christmas on eBay. That includes sticky
tape, wrapping paper, cards, ribbon, and all gifts of any proportion. The idea
is to add things up and see whether or not it is worth trying your luck and
doing your Christmas shopping from your own home on eBay.

Check out his site, and let him know how you came to find him :)

http://theebayexperiment.blogspot.com/

The Times Educational Supplement

2006-08-05T23:43:00.000+01:00

I'm a teacher. I don't think I've ever explicitly stated it on the site (indeed, why would I have need to), but this fact makes me eligible for an appearance in the Times Educational Supplement: the kind of newspaper you could face the sack for if you don't at least give a passing glance to. Which is ironic, really, as all the jobs are featured in it.

So, it's a pretty important newspaper - and they featured the Compendium in it as part of their Work/Life Balance section. Ultimately it's there to say "look, teachers do other things outside the classroom" but as well as profiling the Compendium's quirks, David Mattin's excellent article also demonstrated the educational benefit to be gained from reading others' lists.

278 - Route Planner

2006-08-03T12:35:00.000+01:00

I've often said how I would like to visit some of the shoppers whose lists I have in the Compendium. Sometimes I find their addresses on old envelopes, sometimes on business letterheads. But never before have I been given a map!

Yep, check it out: this is a map from SM1 2TR (St James Road, Sutton) to SW13 9JT, which according to www.streetmap.co.uk is St Paul's School in Hammersmith.

Now, this is interesting because a colleague has just got a new job teaching there...but it's unlikely that she was shopping at New Malden Tesco for a few random bits and bobs (presumably to make chilli con carne) which is where this list was found.

Still, at least if I ever want to visit her new place I know how to get there. If I'm starting from Sutton, that is.

277 - Fishy Father, Filthy Matricide

2006-08-02T11:46:00.000+01:00

You don't find people referred to as "father" and "mother" very much these days. You find "father" and "mother" referred to even less on shopping lists, but that's not to say it never happens - as this list shows.

Something fishy is definitely going on here. The shopper is clearly the offspring of the "father" and "mother" mentioned here, but is buying quite shockingly different things for each of their parents.

"Fish dish for father" is fair enough. Dads like fish. But, "bleach etc washing liquid (mother)" is a bit scary. Could this be a very dirty mother who needs a bloody good clean, or is it the shopper's attempt to kill off the mother for the inheritance? After all, father gets food while mother gets bleach.

The shopper has planned this murder well (and it wouldn't be the first time a murder has been solved through the evidence of a shopping list). In addition to the bleach to poison mother, they have also got "Tissues", "loo paper" and "loo wipes" to ensure all mess is quickly and effectively cleared up along with the "Floor mop liquid". Once that's done, the "Dove hand wash" will rid the final remnants of any evidence down the drain. "White wine" to celebrate the dastardly deed, perhaps?

Sporadic update

2006-07-22T10:49:00.000+01:00

Greeting listophilists!

My apologies for lack of updates recently...I've got a pile of lists waiting to be added, but not enough time to add them. However, work's summer break begins soon and so I'll hopefully have time to update the site then.

I'll also be adding the rather good article from the Times Educational Supplement that was featured last week in their "worklife balance" section.

In the meantime, why don't you mosy on down to the website of Chris Moulin from the Memory Group at the University of Leeds' Institute of Psychological Sciences? He's currently conducting some research into memory associated with shopping lists that he'll be presenting at the International Conference on Memory in Sydney.

276 - This is a List

2006-06-08T07:16:00.000+01:00

This is a list. Oh yes it is. And it's not just any old list, it's a THISISAKNIFE list.

I've just got back from Tesco with the nice chaps from Channel 4's weekly videocast, thisisaknife who featured the Compendium in January. Donal, Tim and I wandered around the trolleys searching out more lists while they recorded a nice little interview for this week's show.

This was the first list we found, and I promised to upload it to the web in case any thisisaknife viewers wanted to see the goodness :)

As for the list, there's a couple of things that stand out. One of them is the fact that "Bread" is written - not only in black pen rather than a pencil - but aso in different handwriting. The second exciting thing is that this is a shopper who either wishes to buy a straight caddy for tea, or maybe already has the caddy but wants some tea leaves for it. How very confusing! You can tell it's summer though - lots of "Salad" and things, although quite why "cucumber" needs to be listed separately is slightly inconsistent.

275 - Musical Fangs

2006-04-10T22:16:00.000+01:00

Yet again, my deciphering skills have left a little to be desired. While I can make out the majority of this list, the odd word escapes me. Or, in the case of the seemingly "Musical Fangs", both words.

Most websites I've found on this topic refer to people sinking their "musical fangs" into stageshows, most of which seem kitschly camp like Rocky Horror.

But I don't think Tesco would take too kindly to me shopping in a basque and fishnets.

274 - Thai Chicken Headache

2006-04-09T11:33:00.000+01:00

The BBC broadcast a cookery program called Ready, Steady, Cook. Anthony Worrall-Thompson crops up on it on occasion (not to be confused with Dr Anthony Worrall at the University of Reading), along with an assortment of other "celebrity chefs" who take it in turns to make a meal out of a bunch of supposedly-random ingredients.

This shopper clearly watches it, as the recipe listed on this A4 sheet is a perfect recreation of Brian Turner's Thai Chicken Soup. In fact, you can even see the frantic scribbling on this list, as the shopper copied down the ingredients during the program.

And "Aspirin" too.

It must be stressful making soup.

273 - Cripple Sauce

2006-04-07T23:13:00.000+01:00

What an unfortunate time for a ballpoint pen to stop working! Just as you round off the eastern reaches of an A you hit an air pocket. And bumph. Instead of buying "Apple Sauce" you get funny looks as you wander the aisles trying to buy Cripple Sauce.

What would cripple sauce be? Part of me thinks it's some kind of super-hot chilli sauce like Dave's Insanity Sauce, or my personal favourite - Dragonfart's Wet N Reddy BBQ sauce.

That stuff could strip wallpaper.

I love it.

272 - Hi Mr. Foster

2006-04-05T14:45:00.000+01:00

And "hi", straight back atcha. Oh, and you'll be paid next week, if that's okay? Thankyou!

Mr Foster is a kind-hearted gentleman. I doubt this is the first time he has gone shopping for bulky goods on behalf of the list-writer, as in order to complete the shop he needs an intricate knowledge of list abbreviation. "K. Roll" and "Mr. Muscle B. Cleaner" are, one would have thought, easy enough to decipher, but in the curious world of the list this is not always the case.

The interesting ditto marks under "Cat" are also worthy of a mention. An ellipsis (three dots) is usually used in speech to indicate a pause or an intentional omission in text; indeed, the word itself comes form the Greek for 'omission'. So why shop for "...litter" or "...bowls". It can mean only one thing. The list-writer meant to use ".

271 - Fruit to Dairy

2006-04-04T18:51:00.000+01:00

Simple, really. It all starts with fruit ("Bananas" and "Lemon juice") and finishes with dairy - "Milk" and "Yoghurts".

Alice likes this list. She reckons you could make something with the "lemon juice", "flour" and "eggs". In fact, they do. Add these together with the "milk" and you've got instant pancakes.

Well, not quite instant, but pancakes nevertheless.

Mmmm, pancakes.

Pancakes.

Mmmm.

270 - Olives to Scale

2006-04-04T18:49:00.000+01:00

"Plain flour" and "Yeast". I thought I was onto it. Really, I did. I thought it was some kind of pie. Especially as "Scale" features somewhere further down the list, perhaps a single weighing scale to measure out the ingredients for the aforementioned pie.

But perhaps not. Indeed, I've never come across a garlic and olive pie, and nor do I particularly want to.

Part of me thinks the secret to this list lies in the right-aligned item, but I can't decipher it. "2 pin frankfurther" perhaps? "2 pin lighter"?

I really haven't got a clue, but some anonymous commenters do. They've worked out that it's actually a "2 pin adapter". That certainly makes more sense than my own suggestions, but still doesn't help with the confusion around the pie. Oh well!

269 - Face It!

2006-03-15T17:52:00.000Z

Those of you who have trawled through the rest of the Compendium will have found that there are certain things that I really like about some shopping lists.

I like people who cateogrise their shop. I like people who write people's names. And I really like people who leave very personal insights. This is one such list.

The listed items themselves are really by-the-by. It's the phone number and address that's the best. Now, normally I'd blank stuff like that out, but this is the phone number and address for a business. And not just any business, but a beautician. And not just any old beautician, but a beautician in North London, about 15 miles away from where I found the list!

A particularly interesting thing about 17 Highgate High Street is that it's got quite a history. Between 1854-5 it was the offices of Hornsey local council's highway board, and went through a number of changes (including being a kebab shop in the mid-1980s) before Face It! took the place over. And they seem to be doign a good job - one website says:

I recently tried this beauty salon in Highgate. The service and attention by the
therapist was first class.The booking system is very efficient and they sell a
huge range of goods which make great presents (not just beauty products). I
would recommend anyone to try them out.

Go on, book yourself a facial and tell them where you found out about them. I bet they don't believe you.

268 - £200 For All That?

2006-03-15T17:18:00.000Z

£200 for all that? Well, perhaps not. The fact that "£200 out" is at the end of the list leads me to an interesting conclusion. Namely, that this is £200 to be withdrawn at the end of the shoppign trip, perhaps through the medium of Cash Back.

I like cashback. It's like the supermarket is paying you shopping with them. Until you look at your bank statement, of course. The big problem with the cashback theory, though, is that the order of the other items on the list is not logical.

To be fair, the shopper has at least grouped items in general categories, but I can assure you that this is Not The Order Of The Store I Found The List At. Therefore either this person is clearly insane (and wrote this list for another store and dropped it at the one I found it at), or my theory is wrong.

Oh well.

267 - Light Lunch and Fags

2006-03-15T17:14:00.000Z

The most intriguing thing about this list is not its content. Oh no. In fact, it's not particularly interesting at all. Quite mundane, in fact. I mean, it just looks like a few snacks for a light lunch.

However, I think it's quite interesting that the shopper has made ingenious use of a discarded cigarette packet to write their list on. It's even better that they've crossed out "LENTILS".

Healthy stuff? Nah, I'll stick to my fags.

This Is A Knife

2006-02-18T19:22:00.000Z

Blimey.

I've just discovered that the cult web-video-podcastish comedy thing featured the Compendium in one of their shows. Check it out at This Is A Knife (the Compendium was the opening item on Tuesday 24th January).

266 - A Delayed Christmas

2006-02-13T18:21:00.000Z

I'm still scratching my head over how on earth this list was still in a trolley nearly a month and a half after Christmas. I guess there's two options.

One is that the list actually went undiscovered in a trolley for 6 weeks as a result of being stacked hundreds deep in the trolley park.

The second option is that the list is actually a new one, and the shopper is simply doing Christmas a tad bit late. Quite how they'd hope to get a large "christmas pudding", "mince pies" or "Christmas crackers" in February is beyond me though. Similarly why get gifts for "ACH + GTH (M&S clothes)" in February?

Perhaps ACH + GTH have been away for a few months and they're hoping to celebrate Christmas now they're back. Or maybe the shopper is living in some kind of weird dimension, a bit like the man who celebrates Christmas everyday.

265 - Tidel Wave

2006-02-12T14:04:00.000Z

I can't help but spot the link between what appears to read "Tidel Rolls" and "Water" on this list. It's a shame, therefore, that I think the rolls are actually "Tiolet Rolls". Either way, they're clearly misspelt.

The juxtaposition of the vague "Tins of Dog Food" with the specific "Pedigree Chum" is also an item of note.

Why the list is divided into two columns - each written in a different colour of pen - is beyond me. Perhaps the colour indicates family/personal use?

264 - Capital Irregularity

2006-02-12T14:02:00.000Z

The first list I found when getting back into collecting, rather than eating from, lists was this one.

It's rare to find a list written predominantly in capital letters, and this one almost holds the award for being The List Completely Written In Capital Letters, but sadly it fails about half-way down (before then regaining its stride).

Is there any signifiance of the lower case "Sweets" or "Comfort". Perhaps the significance is actually that these items are _not_ significant, whereas items in capital letters are. But in that case, what does the crossing out mean, if not that something is insignificant?

Clearly this list presents us with a serious cognitive challenge.

Back to Normality?

2006-02-12T13:26:00.000Z

Well, it's been a funn few weeks with all the media attention on the Compendium, but it's looking like things are slowly drifting back to normal. I'm on a halft-erm break from where I teach now, but much of my time is being taken up with packing boxes - we're moving house.

However, I'm also hoping to get some lists on the Compendium as soon as possible. Watch this space...

Londonist

2006-02-06T20:05:00.000Z

Local news is great, and there's one particularly good website to catch up on all the cool stuff that happens in London. It's called Londonist and today they published an interview with me, having already done a story on the Compendium in which I'm referred to as a "lovable loon". Cool, eh?

More Media!

2006-01-31T18:09:00.000Z

This morning the Compendium was featured on BBC Radio London's Breakfast Show with Jono Coleman and JoAnne Good. Ben came round in the radio car (i.e. a big estate with an enormous aerial that rises through the roof) to chat about the collection and the experiment this morning, although the interview wasn't broadcast until later on in the show.

Unfortunately for me, this meant I actually ended up missing it because I was at work. Doh!

As well as this spot on the radio I've also seen last week's interview with Kelly Armstrong at the Wimbledon News crop up in a couple of other places. It's so far appeared in the freely distributed Mitcham and Morden Guardian, and the Wimbledon Guardian under slightly different guises. For some reason, The St. Albans Observer also featured the story...despite the fact I live on the other side of London!

It also appeared, in slightly edited form, on This Is Local London - a website dedicated to (obviously) local stories in the captial.

Introduction to The Shopping List Experiment

2006-01-26T21:49:00.000Z

Greetings!

Many thanks to those of you who have been in touch since my appearance on Richard Hammond's 5 O'Clock Show. I had a fantastic time doing the show and Richard, Mel and the production team were fantastically friendly and welcoming to this "extraordinary man who collects shopping lists".

Since doing the show I've had many people contact me through both list comments and email to ask more about The Shopping List Experiment. While I get myself ready to update the site with my full shenanigans, I thought I'd upload an edit I've done of the video diary I kept during the two-week long Experiment to give you an introduction to what the Experiment was all about.

Just so you know, it's a Windows Media File and is just under 2.5MB in size. Ready to watch it? Well then...just hit play, and wait for it to buffer (about 10 seconds on a broadband connection).

(p.s. the music is The Clash's "Lost In The Supermarket" and "Mum's Gone To Iceland" by Bennet).

The Compendium Hits the TV!

2006-01-25T11:01:00.001Z

Hello all,

Regular visitors may wonder why the Compendium has not been updated in the past few weeks. Well, it's not because I've been stalking the Celebrity Big Brother House but rather that I've been working on a very secret, but very exciting, Shopping List Experiment.

I can't say too much at the moment, but can reveal that it's all to do with abandoned shopping lists (predictably) and what I eat.

All will be revealed live on today's (Wednesday 25th January) "Richard Hammond's 5 O'Clock Show" on ITV1. Tune in from 5pm to find out more!

A busy day!

2006-01-25T10:38:00.000Z

I've just got back from doing a very fun interview on Shane O'Connor's mid-morning show on Radio Derby where I spoke about the Compendium and plugged the TV show I'm on this afternoon. The surreal thing about it was that while Shane was in his studio in Derby, I was sat in a tiny little room in Broadcasting House in London - yet it sounded like we were in the same room. Ah, the wonders of technology, eh?

In addition to touting my wares on the radio this morning I also made it onto the front page of the Wimbledon News, my local paper! And all this before I've even had time for my breakfast of pancakes and strawberry syrup. The caption under the photo asks whether "Collector Scott Allsop" is "Off his trolley?" That's genius.

263 - Mexican Tonight?

2006-01-07T14:26:00.000Z

What if the answer is "yes"?

Having gone to the effort of writing a list for various food items, it really surprises me that this shopper is tempted to discard it in favour of asking "Mexican tonight??" That they clearly need to use a list to remember such basics as "2 x Bread" and "Milk" suggests that the shopper doesn't stand much chance of getting the correct ingredients to make "Mexican tonight??" without a prompt.

However, perhaps the list has been written FOR a shopper, not BY the shopper. In this case, the list may be the items noted by someone left at home, who has also suggested to the shopper that they could get "Mexican tonight??"

I'm also a bit confused by the indentation for "Ham", "pizza" and "Mince" under "Ravioli". Indentation usually suggests the inclusion of itmes that fit under a subheading, or are related to the left-aligned item above. On this list, though, this isn't the case.

My mind boggles.

262 - Pencil and Pen

2006-01-07T14:24:00.000Z

The erratic noting of items (see how "clear candle bulb" takes up the width of the paper, but "Box for champagne" is squeezed into the top right corner) suggests that this list has been created as an when items have been required in the home. The is theory is supported by the various writing implements used - blue biro, black biro and even pencil.

My favourite item on this list is "nice ham". The vagueness of this, combined with the erratic nature of the list, reveals someone who has begun the new year with a distinctly confused bump.

261 - Just the Two?

2006-01-05T21:51:00.000Z

"eggs. x 2." What is this strange code? One would think that this shopper means to only buy 2 eggs, but such a feat is impossible on our modern supermarkets. Nay, eggs come in a minumum of a half-dozen, right up to batches of 36. And so, I assume the shopper requires 2 half dozen boxes of eggs. I doubt anyone could get through 72 of them.

The apperance of "bubble bath." halfways down the list is quite funny. Its placement after "g almonds." makes it seem like some kind of high class bathtime ritual, but I suspect the shopper simply remembered, "aaah, I need bubble bath!" while considering the ingredients for marzipan, or whatever they were getting the ground almonds for.

"Walkers", I presume, are crisps. I'm quite sure that even my local (but enormous) Tesco has not developed an in-store range of ramblers just yet.

260 - Chips, and More Chips

2006-01-05T21:33:00.000Z

What beautiful handwriting. Really, I mean it. Mine looks like an inebriated spider has stumbled across the page, but this shopper has lovely handwriting. What they don't have, though is any shame.

The list begins reasonably sanely, as a combination of necessary homewares, and then moving onto food for the cupboard. It all goes wrong after "chips" though. "ketchup" is fair enough: chips and nice with ketchup. But what is with "chips vinegar"?

There could be three possible explanations. Firstly, the shopper wishes to buy chips specifically to eat with vinegar. Second, they want vinegar that is specifically to eat with chips. The third option is that they want chips pre-flavoured with vinegar. If the list arrangement is anything to go by, I reckon it must be option three...but I've never known of chips that are pre-flavoured with vinegar.

The problem is that the shopper has maintained a system of one-item-per-line down the whole of the list, even going so far as to separate "chips" from "ketchup". "Chips vinegar" MUST be a single item. Wow!

259 - Starting Badly

2006-01-02T22:11:00.000Z

Compared to the first shop by the owner of list 258, this shopper is starting 2006 badly. I must admit that our first shop today wasn't the best example of healthy eating (bread, naan bread and carrots were the constituent parts, but we did eye up a big chocolate cake for a few minutes before deciding that our drawer of chocolates was more than enough to keep us going).

This shopper, though is clearly wanting to put on a bit of weight this year. In fact, the potentially healthiest thing on here is "cocoa", which while not strictly fattening in itself can be lethal when given to...well...me to mix with full cream milk, plenty of sugar, and sit and get a chocolately moustache. Mmmmm.

I think I'm going to have to raid that chocolate drawer...

258 - New Year Cleaning

2006-01-02T22:10:00.000Z

The first list of 2006 is absolutely perfect. Just as we begin to think about tidying our houses after the onslaught of the holiday period, this shopper is one step ahead and has actually bought their cleaning wares. "J Cloths", "Disposable cloths" and even a pair of "Rubber Gloves" are there, but not before they've had a strong cup of "Filter Coffee" to ensure they can face the awful mess.

Perhaps they've made a New Year's resolution to keep their house clean...and then decided that a great way to begin was to get a bunch of flowers to make the place smell nice as well? If you look carefully, "Flowers" are in a slightly different coloured pen, proving that they were an after-thought.

Happy New Year!

2006-01-01T20:05:00.000Z

Greetings, listophilists, and happy 2006! The Christmas season has gone and, I must admit, was a bit disappointing for this list collector. I expected there to be hundreds of the little things around but, despite visiting the supermarket (or at least the supermarket car park) a number of times over the break I found very few.

My theory for this is twofold. Firstly, there were considerably more trolley blokes on duty than normal, and so rather than trolleys beign spewed all over the car park as normal, they were stacked in neat rows from which it is almost impossible to retrieve lists, even if you can see them.

Secondly, I think people are a bit more protective over lists that they have spent considerable amounts of time creating.

But now the New Year is upon us I'm hoping that list quantities will soon return to normal and I'll be able to hit the 300-mark before the site's first birthday in April. Here's hoping...

And so, without further ado, onto the lists!

257 - A Bigger Christmas

2005-12-24T10:28:00.000Z

Most of the Christmas lists I've found so far are quite small. In a way they've been disappointing. I wanted something that showed the horrendous marks of capitalism - gorging on mounds of unwanted food and drink. But no, people seem to have been rather sensible on the amounts they've been buying.

So too is this shopper, but at least the list itself is a big one. I mean, it's truly littered with stuff. Clearly at a loss for presents (or perhaps part of a bid to shut the relatives up through inebriation), the shopper is buying "little bottle of Scotch. Bells." and "Bottle of hock nan." Presumably both these being so close together on the list, are for grandpa and nan respectively. In addition to these drinks, though, are some real classics - "Cavatt. Snowball drink" and "little bottle of Vodka" come further down. I don't know what Cavatt is...perhaps they mean advocaat - a key ingredient of a Snowball.

A selection of CDs has been specified, and due to the range of ones listed I'd guess that a few of them are intended as gifts. "Audio Bully's C.D.", "destinys Child CD GREATEST HITS", "Suger Babes CD" and "War of the world CD" not only reflect diverse musical tastes, but also that annoying trait of improper apostrophe usage.

Presents aside, there are a decent amount of food items as well. From a range of the expected including "Sasage meat", "Party nibbles", "Prawns" and "Parsnips" to the curious ("Red lasagna sauce") this shopper is truly preparing a feast.

Rock on, I say.

256 - Vital Cranberry Sauce

2005-12-23T23:42:00.000Z

Part of me thinks that this is a shopper who is undertaking an emergency Christmas shop, especially as it was found on the 23rd December. We did our Christmas shop at just after midnight and found the store to be run amok with people, so only someone who wants to carry out an emergency shop would even consider going into the store during the day.

A lot of the items seem to be those last-minute Christmas feasties that make the day, hence my assumption. "Cranberry Sauce *" really stands out due to the asterisk, suggesting a certain extreme desire to be able to buy this particular item.

However, I don't really think that anyone would be buying "Veg", "Potatoes" or "X'mas Pud" as emergency items. Nor would someone be buying cheese and biscuits so late...although a certain dappiness is shown on the list through the separate listings of "Cheese Biscuits" and then, not until another 6 items later, "Cheese".

255 - Stinky House

2005-12-23T23:40:00.000Z

O-ho, my word! "4 bleach", "4 Tins airfreshener", "80 black bags". This is, surely, the most smelly house in Britain!

Alice reckons this is the list of a cleaning contractor, but I personally reckon that a cleaning contractor would buy this kind of equipment from a wholesaler, rather than New Malden Tesco. Besides, what kind of a cleaning contractor needs "Hair dye"?

Okay, don't answer that.

Anyway, all these musing reflect my gut instinct: that this shopper simply lives in a horrendously stinky house. They may be preparing for the Christmas onslaught ("80 black bags" will be helpful for the reams of pointless wasted wrapping paper), but quite where the "2 Tins of polish" fit in is beyond me.

254 - Dear Sanda

2005-12-22T14:17:00.000Z

I let out an audible "awwww" when I recovered this torn up note from a shopping trolley this morning. The beginning of a letter to "Sanda", the young person who wrote this tore it up and threw it in a trolley to hide their spelling shame.

Now, while I am usually a stickler for people using corect spellign and grammer, I think we can afford to let this one go. I mean, I'm sure Santa wouldn't have been offended so neither should we.

253 - Jade's Magnetism

2005-12-22T14:12:00.000Z

Argos is a curious place. Famed for its elite range of jewellery (Elizabeth Duke), the store operates not on item names but rather product numbers. There's also something sinisterly Soviet about the purchasing process in that you queue and pay for the item, before then queuing again to collect it from a teenage 'warehouse assistant' in a fluorescent shirt.

This list was, as you've probably realised by now, found in an Argos store. A little bit of internet research has pointed me towards item "353/0357" being a "Magentic Drawing Board". It looks like Magna Doodle, but cheaper.

Much as I mock, I wish I had one.

252 - More Gastroenteritis?

2005-12-22T09:44:00.000Z

I know. Discussing the various states of the digestive system is not why most people visit the Compendium but, whether you like it or not, the content of the list is that way inclined.

Only a couple of lists ago we saw that a Christmas dinner also called for "Bum wipes". However, on this list, the shopper is clearly wishing to avert an intestinal overload through preparing thoroughly clean surfaces with "Tesco's Antibacterial Cleaner".

I'm personally quite thankful for the care they demonstrate. After all, a kitchen can hoard handfuls of different germs if not properly cared for. Fortunately, the Christmas disaster in this household has been averted through intelligent forward-planning. It's also good to see they're preparing for a mighty big turkey with their "Foil - long one Long one".

251 - What a Difference an 'S' Makes

2005-12-22T09:40:00.000Z

Pluralisation is an important part of shopping, as it signifies whether more than one of a particular item is required. However, the pluralisation of an item that already appears as a single is just crazy. Check out the "sausages" on this list, swiftly followed by "Sausages" for a prime example.

But closer scrutinisation of the list suggests alternative explanations. Perhaps these are different kinds of sausages. While "sausages" are placed close to "Turkey", "Sausage" has a better acquaintance with "Bacon". For Christmas dinner we often porcupine the turkey with sausages on sticks, which explains the linking of the first two items.

Then again, the sausages are usually pigs in blankets - sausages wrapped in bacon. Perhaps this list isn't as easily explained as I thought.

250 - Christmas Dinner Induces Diarrhea

2005-12-22T09:37:00.000Z

Something smells fishy. It may be that I've got my 'conspiracy theory' hat on again, but this shopper seems to be purposely setting out to give their Christmas dinner guests some severe intestinal problems.

According to the notepaper, "Revenge is a dish best served chilled". If, indeed, this is the aim of the shopper then presumably the aforementioned revenge is to inflicted through the "cream" or "cream soda". Eurgh.

But how do I know they are out to provide digestive difficulties? Simple - they're fully prepared with "Bum wipes". Then again, these might simply be in preparation for the blowback from the "sprouts"...

249 - Emergency Pringles

2005-12-22T09:34:00.000Z

Emergency items, for those who are only just tuning in to the Compendium, are those which are added at the last minute to a list - usually signified by different handwriting or a different coloured pen.

In this example, "pringles" are added as an emergency item. One presumes that these are intended as a kind of 'snack' on Christmas Day, as the list features such festive favourites as "xmas log + cake" and "xmas pudding", but similarly they may simply be to bolster the junk-intake of "chips" and "biscuits".

Interestingly, the curiously shaped pad appears to be from Harrods. Check out the faint remnants of the logo at the bottom if you don't believe me.

248 - Ham 4 Boxing Day

2005-12-21T15:59:00.000Z

Boxing Day, it seems, is a distinctly pointless British tradition. Indeed, even the Simpsons made reference to the ridiculousness of it in their Christmas broadcast last year. Stupid and pointless as it may be, though, I don't think it's any more crazy than Thanksgiving. I mean - an annual meal to remember when the Native Americans saved the Pilgrims' collective backsides from starvation. It sounds a great idea. How about the reservations? "But we do a big dinner, so why do you need your land back?" Compared to this, I think a holiday based loosely around St Stephen's Day is quite sane.

Anyway, I'm getting distracted from the list. The exciting thing about this shopper is how they're preparing for the further culinary onslaught of Boxing Day with "Ham". But it's not all too far advanced. Don't believe be? Check the "BRussels", set apart (as they should be) from other "Greens". THAT is Christmas food.

247 - The Week Before Christmas

2005-12-21T12:22:00.000Z

In the lead up to Christmas we all begin to buy items for the big day that will last for more than a couple of days. As a result, this shopper's list is a fascinating combination of Christmas items ("Mince pies", "Sprouts" and "Sausage meat") and the everyday ("nappies?" and "Bold").

Being selective about some of the other items on the list, though, one might also construe that the shopper is creating a very memorable Christmas day - "condoms", "baby wipes" and rubber gloves".

Wow!

246 - PROPER First Christmas List

2005-12-21T12:19:00.000Z

Why do the gods conspire against me in such a way? After the false-start of Christmas lists previsouly, I have gone on to find my first REAL Christmas list. Wonderful! Apart from the fact it's written in pencil, and therefore nigh-on impossible to scan properly onto the Compendium.

I hope that, despite this, you can still share my excitement at seeing "BRUSSELS" and the curiously numbered "1001 ISLAND" sauce. There's a couple of interesting ones on here as well, especially "DOG".

I know for a fact that they don't sell pets in Tesco, but there is a pet superstore just up the road. Is this person seriously wanting to buy their canine friend from a shop?

245 - First Christmas List

2005-12-21T12:18:00.000Z

Against my better instincts (I originally picked the list out of a trolley, promptly dropped it and a man walked over it) I kept hold of this list - footprint included - because I was desperate for my first Christmas list. And here it is, with a heading of "Christmas" and everything!

But everything is strange. "Roast Beef Salad" is not, in my book, a Christmas meal. However, when we see the other itmes ("Ham/Salami" and "King Prawns/Mayo") I think I can see what's going on.

Written in the cursive script of an older shopper, the items are not for Christmas dinner but rather Christmas tea. I'm guessing that this is mum/grandma who has been invited to lunch at her child's house, but is hosting tea at hers.

So, really, it's not my first real Christmas list at all. Darn it!

244 - Food vs. Drink

2005-12-21T12:17:00.000Z

Arranged into two opposing columns, the food vs. drink list is a typical example of basic organisation. However, my rudimentary knowledge of science has picked up on the first two items on the list: "ICE" and "SALT" are, surely, absolute enemies of each other. So why buy them one after the other?

243 - A Table of (dis)Organisation

2005-12-21T10:07:00.000Z

Wow, what a fantastic list! I'm a big fan of organisation, and an even bigger fan of pre-printed lists. While this is arranged into sections, it's not in the order that items are laid on in the shop...but I think we can excuse that little mistake.

Comparing the tickets items to the unticked is an interesting exercise. While there are a significant number of "junk food" items mentioned on the list, very few of them are actually ticked for purchase.

What I find particularly amusing, though, is the way in which the pre-prepared list has failed this shopper. Around the edges are written a variety of emergency items, very clearly being for Christmas ("wrapping paper", "chipolatas", "snacks" and "nibbles" - although I don't know the difference the between these last two).

Curiously, some of the emergency items ARE pre-printed in boxes ("White Wine" has even been ticked, but "Orange juice" hasn't).

All-in-all this is the tabulated list of a shopper who outwardly projects an image of calm organisation, but beneath the facade is just as frantically messy as you or I.

242 - Desperate for Youth

2005-12-21T09:59:00.000Z

This list is rather sad. While regular items ("BACON", "MiLK" and "BREAD") make up the centre of the list, it's the peripherals that are most interesting.

The urgency with which "WATER FILTERS!" is scrawled at the head of the list indicates absolute neccessity. So, really, we need to think about why people use water filters. The Healthy House Ltd says that "Clean water is essential for healthy living", before goign on at quite boring length about how many times water has been recycled before we drink it. From this evidence, therefore, we can work out that the shopper is a keen health fanatic (as long as we choose to ignore the "BACON", "KETCHUP" and "PIZZAS" on the list!)

Secondly, there are the items at the lower-right of the list. Vanity items including "Revlon Age Defying All Day Lifting Foundation" and "No 7 Uplifting Foundation" scream to me the title of this list. I am convinced that this list belongs to someone desperately holding on to what youth they have, in a bid to beat the aging process.

Now, I realised yesterday that as well as having a receding hairline I'm also getting considerably thinner on top...but I don't think there's any creams that can help me appear something I'm not!

241 - Fruitilicious

2005-12-21T09:56:00.000Z

Okay, so it's not all fruit. In fact it's predemoninantly vegetables and salad items - but I think you get the idea. Finally someone to add to the collection with a healthy eating conscience. Not that others don't have one, mind, but they're few and far between - especially in this season of excess.

Weird Web Award

2005-12-20T08:58:00.000Z

So, the Compendium has been recognised by AlterVistas as "a web site of outstanding oddness". Excellent!

The Weird Web Award.
Click here to verify.

240 - Whose Juice

2005-12-19T17:27:00.000Z

This list was stuck, tempting me, to the glass window of a trolley park in Tesco's. Since the Sun article, I've been finding lists at my local Tesco in considerably shorter supply than normal, but I wonder whether this is as a result of the article itself or merely the change in weather. I would have thought that more lists would be appearing as we near Christmas, and I'm still desperate to get my hands on one with "brussel sprouts", but until then I'll have to be content with lists such as this.

It's the "Juice" that intrigues me. Is this "Tom's Juice" (in which case there's an inaccurate apostrophe), or "Tom(ato(e))s Juice", in which case I think there's an amount of erratic pluralisation taking place. Either way, the shopper knows what they want - and what they don't. Evidently the "Baguette" is French enough for this shopper. "Croissants" have been crossed off.

239 - Aisle by Aisle

2005-12-19T17:25:00.000Z

Two aisle geniuses (genii?) in a row. Amazing.

Starting at the door end by the toilettries, this shopper has listed their items in such a way as to be able to parade up and down the aisles at ease. While I praise such organisation, I can't help but query getting "potatoes" in the middle of a shop. This is sticking to the layout of the shop too closely, in my opinion, as I strongly believe in buying fruit and veg either at the start or the end of a shop.

It would confuse me any other way.

238 - Juice, not Bread

2005-12-19T17:19:00.000Z

Quite how it's possible to mistake "Juice" for "Bread" is beyond me. One is firm and made of flour, the other is squeezed from fruit. But this shopper did decide to scribble "Bread" off their list and replace it with "Juice", only to add "Bread" onto the list further down.

However, perhaps the truth is that this shopper is cunning. "Juice", "cheese" and "milk" live close to each other in the supermarket, whereas "Bread" is nearest to "sandwich filler" and "Eggs". Just like on the list! This may well be the work of an aisle genius.

230 - Napkin Shopping

2005-12-19T17:16:00.000Z

Writing on napkins seems to be something that lots of us do, but rarely are these scribbles of any practical use other than to pass the time while waiting for our dinner to arrive. This shopper used that time wisely, though, jotting down items they needed from the supermarket.

I'm worried by the "*Money*" though, as perhaps this shopper has gone into a restaurant without enough cash to pay for their food.

Then again, perhaps they weren't actually in a restaurant while they wrote this...

236 - International Pooh

2005-12-19T17:14:00.000Z

Pooh Bear paper, and written in an unknown language. I'm at a loss with these - "laks", "shasonercette", "Basilikum". Something about it sounds German, if not even further Eastern Europe, but that's just a guess. Any help gratefully received!

Christmas break means more time for lists!

2005-12-19T17:11:00.000Z

Although only 2 weeks, I'm hopign that my Christmas break will give me a chance to catch up on some of my listing. I've got loads of work to be getting on with over the break, but I'm always desperate to get the collection back up to date after a hectic term of teaching.

I'm also hopign ot lay my hands on a stereotypically festive list - something with "Turkey" and "brussel sprouts" would be fantastic.

Oh, and you'll have to bear with me while I get to grips with my new scanner. The old one gave up.

235 - More from Sri Lanka, Perhaps?

2005-12-11T18:38:00.000Z

It's been a while since I found a list written in a foreign script, but one at last makes an appearance. The only thing I think I can make out is "Lenor", but I'm not even sure about that. Let's hope that my trusty listophilist contributors can put me out of my linguistic shame and help with the translation!

234 - Smoking Babies

2005-12-11T18:35:00.000Z

It's been a bumper trip for parenting lists, and I'm afraid this is another list that I'm going to criticise.

This is another parent who clearly cares for their baby (they've splashed out extra to buy "pampers sensitive" rather than the, presumably, non-sensitive type). They're even opting for "baby wipes (Johnsons)" rather than own brand. But they also buy "toothpaste (smokers)", suggesting a baby being raised in a place where they will be a passive smoker. I hope this isn't the case, but I do get a knot in my stomach when I think about some of the children that emerge through these lists.

233 - Toothrot and Calpol

2005-12-11T18:30:00.000Z

I wouldn't claim to be an expert in the raising of children (although I certainly have my own ideas...) but this list is just asking for trouble.

It's a kind-of contradiction in terms.

The shopper lists "choco", "cake", "orange drinks", "sugar", and even a "coke bottle small". That's surely getting on for the gross regional output of Norfolk's sugar beet crop, which can't be great for one's teeth.

The contradiction comes in with "calpol" - a medicine that is a paracetamol suspension, especially created to ease the pain of teething in children. The parent evidently cares about their child's teeth, so why all the sugar?

Nice of them to include a "car toy", though. At least the little 'un will be happy.

Meet the ana-LIST

2005-12-09T15:41:00.000Z

Well, this is rather cool.

In August I was interviewed by Caroline Iggulden at The Sun about the Compendium, but the piece was never published. Now, after 4 months of sitting on file, the article has made it to print - although I've since become a year older, and changed my hair style!

Still, it's fun to see that an afternoon of chatting about lists and pulling funny faces for the camera paid off and that a new group of listophilists has begun to visit the Compendium and share their thoughts on the collection. Welcome, Sun readers!

232 - The Line Between Good and Bad

2005-12-05T20:58:00.000Z

What a list of beautiful construction. Not only individually numbered, the items are split into two groups. The shopper refers to one as "Other", but I'd be inclined to view it as their way of dividing the food they approve of from that they don't. I could compare like-for-like numbers to support my suggestion: 3 could be either "Lemon Juice for cooking" or "Drinks 2 Value" (presumably value cola and lemonade). 4 is "Frozen Vegs" or "Value Crisps". See what I mean?

Perhaps the scorning of "Kitkat" is a woman's way to undermind her husband's shopping urges. The instruction "fruits and vegs wait until I see the market" is clearly a female directing her husband. It's interesting, therefore, that we see "Potatos" have made an appearance. Are they not "vegs"?

The reverse of the list is clearly an employee's record of the hours they have worked at Linwood, which a quick Google has revealed is a private care home in Thames Ditton. Apparently it specialises in dementia, the elderly, older age (both of which, I'm sure are basically the same thing and also a little vague), and physical disability. Then again, it doesn't take a genius to work out that this is a care home: the first column is headed "Carer".

231 - Chocolate Cake

2005-12-05T20:55:00.000Z

I adore chocolate cake. Alice makes two superb ones. One is a straight chocolate sponge, but the other is a triple chocolate cake with dates and walnuts.

It strikes me that this list is a shopping list for specific chocolate cake ingredients ("Caster Sug", "eggs", "dark choc. 175g min 70%"). That chocolate sounds awesome. 70% cocoa fats? Mmmmm.

I'm not sure about adding "sour cream" to a chocolate cake though. It's sugar all the way for me.

Hello/Bonjour Canadians!

2005-12-05T20:51:00.000Z

I always get excited when people decide to link to the Compendium. I get even more excited when the site is not UK based (although it's cool when Brits link to the site), but today topped the lot - the Compendium is the Site of Day on MSN Canada!

So, in honour of the new visitors who may pop by as a result of the link (hello! feel free to add your own cross-Atlantic comments to my collection!), it's time to again dust off the scanner and add some new lists...

230 - My Kinda Party

2005-12-02T23:50:00.000Z

Oh yes. "Pink wafers" and "bendy straws". This, for those of you who missed the magic of birthday parties in the 1980s, is where it was at.

You'd turn up at someone's birthday party to find a long line of trestle tables covered in cheap crumpled paper. In the middle would be selections of sandwiches (meat paste and Dairylea, but not usually mixed) and plates full of pink wafers. Your drink would be cheap lemonade, drunk for a limp plastic cup through a striped bendy straw.

I'm guessing it must be a very Brit-specific thing, pink wafers and bendy straws, if the confused comment on this post is anything to go by, so I guess I should elaborate:

Pink wafers are...well...wafers that are pink, and sandwiched together with a vanilla flavour cream.
Pass the parcel is apparently of Nigerian origin, and is a children's party game where you pass a multi-layered wrapped parcel in a circle, and remove a layer at a time when the music stops.
Musical chairs, meanwhile, is a game where you walk in a circle round a set of chairs of which there is one chair less than the number of people playing. When the music stops, everyone goes to sit down...leaving one person chairless and, usually, in tears.
According to a report written by the Education Minister in 2000, Margaret Hodge, musical chairs is "too violent" for children.

Anyway, it's good to see the tradition of pink wafers and bendy straws keeps going. Now, where's my invitation?

Chippy is quids in for charity

2005-12-02T23:45:00.000Z

Now, this is scary. At the end of June 2005 I included a list written on the back of a piece of paper from Seafare chip shop and made a comment. A person got in touch with me to say they work at Seafare. Then, a week ago (and therefore 5 months later), I found an old newspaper which features a story on Seafare chip shops raising £8,040 for St Luke's Cancer Appeal.

Scary coincidence, or the guiding hand of fate?

229 - Plan Personnel at McDonalds

2005-11-27T17:50:00.000Z

Plan Personnel offer industrial commercial and catering temporary staff. Also, they either provide these staff to McDonalds...or their employees eat there.

While waiting for a train from Kings Cross, Alice and I came across this list in the charity collection box at the McDonalds opposite the station entrance. Judging by the fact that all the items are from the breakfast menu, I can come to the conclusion that this list had been there all day (as we weren't in the store until 7.30pm).

This indicates two things. Firstly, that some people feel that McDonalds Breakfasts are charity and, secondly, that the McDonalds in Kings Cross is not cleaned as often as one would hope. Perhaps Plan Personnel could help them out?

228 - Comprehensive Unused

2005-11-27T17:45:00.000Z

As far as comprehensive, pre-prepared lists go, this is a good 'un. However, I shudder at the way it has been used. I mean, so few items are indicated it's hardly worth using the pre-prepared list.

But it's worse than that. 10 x "Heinz Tomato Soup"? 6 x "Evaporated Milk"? 3+3 x "WHISKY"?!

This is no ordinary list but rather the ventings of a maniac, surely.

227 - Very Dirty Bathroom

2005-11-24T20:40:00.000Z

Aha! Dotted around the page like something out of the Da Vinci Code this list is not a secret code but rather an expression of precise organisation. I'm particularly perturbed by the large number of cleaning items on the list (especially the "rust remover"), considering the shopper is also buying basics such as "eggs", "cheese" and "sugar". On such a shop as this I would expect to see less cleaning materials and more food.

226 - Mexican and Stuff

2005-11-24T20:38:00.000Z

Although surrounded by loads of other 'stuff', it's easy to spot the items for a Mexican dinner perching in amongst this list. "Onion", "Mince x 2", "chilli Jar" (see, I told you it was there), "Red kidney beans" and "Tortilla's + cheese" (despite the incorrect apostrophe) make a pretty good chilli con carne in my book. However, I personally favour the addition of Dragonfart's Wet 'N Reddy Barbeque Sauce for an extra kick in my recipe. Diana who makes and sells the stuff is a very friendly and helpful person. I suggest you get in touch and buy some.

But I'm getting sidetracked by my stomach.

I assume that the "bolognaise" listed is, therefore, of the ready-meal type as the individual recipe items are not specified. After all, if you go to the effort of listing chilli ingredients you would have added the bolognaise stuff as this, too, is mince based.

Wouldn't you?

225 - Becca Might be at School

2005-11-24T20:36:00.000Z

Becca needs "TPaste + BBath". At least she's keeping clean, which is good. There's something about this list that feels it's written by mum, and therefore Becca is her daughter.

There is, therefore, the distinct possibility that, as Becca is at school (note the "School Bars", whatever they are) she is one of the Beccas at the school where I work...as it's barely 5 minutes' walk from the Tesco where I picked this list up.

Pointless Site

2005-11-24T19:34:00.000Z

Despite the fact I've been too busy to add any of the billions of lists that are crowding my desk, it's really nice that people have continued to pop by and look at the stuff already on here. Today I've also been given the honour of being an official Pointless Site, thanks to the nice people at http://www.pointlesssites.com/

So, I guess it's time I got off my backside and scanned some lists in...

224 - Mum's List for Dad

2005-10-14T19:06:00.000+01:00

Lists like this reveal so much about the shopper and their family that it's hard to know where to start. In this particular case, I've decided to begin with the deduction that while the shopper is male, the person who wrote the list is not. Oh, and they're parents.

"Anything for you" demonstrates that the shopper and the list write are not the same person. "Thick Nivea cream" would suggest that the list write is female. And "Nappies", followed up with "Nappies & wipes" further down the list prove the presence of a sprog. Interestingly, the list also features "Preg Test", but this is the only item on the list that hasn't been crossed out, and so supposedly not bought! Is dad in denial of a sequel?

Mum has also given some fantastic directions. "Water (Masses & masses)" ensures that he gets plenty, whereas "4+ pizzas (flavours you like)" strikes me as quite romantic.

The great thing about this list is that when you turn it over, it gets even better. I've evidently covered up any particularly personal details about the people on the letter, but I can assume one of two things. Either the shopper is Frank D. Numann (but then again, why would he still keep hold of a letter that he wrote and signed from 3 and a half months ago), OR the recipient of the letter is the shopper. In which case, as the recipient's address is written on this letter, I KNOW WHERE THEY LIVE!

If I was Danny Wallace or Dave Gorman, I'd probably go round to their flat and try to meet them. For the purposes of my hobby, though, I think that this would be taking things a step too far. After all, they might not like the deductions I've made about them on the site. Who knows what horrible tortures could lie in wait if I ventured round there to get a photograph with one of my shoppers? Then again, the web reports that 2-bedroom apartments in their block go for about £1,600 per month so maybe they wouldn't be too hostile. Or maybe they're in theMafiaa to afford that much rent. Who knows.

The confusing thing about all this, though, is the postcodes. If the recipient of the letter was the shopper, this means that they live in SE1, which is at least a 25-minute train ride and 15 minute walk from where the list was found in a shopping trolley at Tesco, New Malden (KT3). SW1, where Frank now lives, is a bit further still, as it's on the other side of the river.

Still, it's quite cool knowing that I could visit one of my shoppers if I really wanted to.

Maybe I should send a "New House" card to Frank D. Numann, though, because I also know where he's moved to :-)

223 - Bought, or Not Needed?

2005-10-14T18:52:00.000+01:00

Lines through items usually suggest to me that the shopper has bought the crossed-out item. However, on this list I'm not sure. The problem lies in the fact that only "CHEESE" and "POTATOES - VEGES" have been crossed out, while there are still loads of items left on the list. Key to this is that "MILK" - an item that I see as a staple - remains uncrossed.

It's very confusing indeed.

222 - Mammal Milk

2005-10-14T18:50:00.000+01:00

Sadly the illegibility of the handwriting means that I can't be sure that the third item on the list is "mammal milk". This is especially true as, unless my memory of biology is completely wrong, milk can only be obtained from mammals anyway.

Then again, the shopper also wants "Blue Flowers" which, again according to my biology teacher, is impossible - blue flowers don't exist. This leaves me with the conclusion that either my biology teacher was wrong, or the shopper's was. Can any biology teachers or students help me on this one?

And what's most curious is that "mammal milk" features again on the second side of the list. Then again, loads of others things are on here that are similarly illegible, so perhaps I should stop wasting my time working this one out and just grab a drink.

221 - Football Trivia Game

2005-10-14T18:45:00.000+01:00

Why on earth would someone take a football trivia game along to the supermarket? And why would they leave one of the cards behind?

The best I can come up with is this: it was taken along to entertain the shopper's offspring. And it was left behind because the questions go back to 1996, so unless the offspring is quite old, they're not going to have a clue which team was led into Division One by Chris Kamara in 1996. (For the answers, click here).

220 - Suicide is Painless

2005-10-11T17:43:00.000+01:00

The theme tune to M*A*S*H was called "Suicide is Painless". The Manics did a cover of it a few years later, and it was probably better than the original. Either way, the message struck home with this shopper.

I'm firstly amazed by the incredibly small writing on this list. Couple that with the sheer quantity of stuff and you can tell that this is a person for whom organisation and direction in life are important. They're also painfully precise, judging by the accuracy with which they colour each circular shape in the letters of the note paper's heading. The specific mention of "cat food / Jelly" suggests a shopper for whom pets are vitally important. They are also into treating themself on occassion: "comics" with which to relax in front of the TV, and perhaps "Sainsburys" shares to practice some business deals?

But what's this about suicide being painless? Firstly, the ominous circling of "tablets" suggests either a proposed overdose, or something to mask the pain of the "razor blades". However, they can't be planning on ending it for a while: they've got "Coke - 24" (cans) to get through. Stick with it, shopper!

219 - Canadian Livestock and 3 Lucky Dips

2005-10-11T17:35:00.000+01:00

"Moose". Mousse? I reckon so.

There's some other wonders on this list - I doubt that it's possible to get stale "Nivea Deodrant", but it's evidently possible to get "FRESH". And do they mean "Humous" instead of "Humourous"? Perhaps it's just that they find liquidised chick peas particularly funny.

I like the circled importance of there being 3 "Lucky Dips" on the lottery, and the way that all the cigarette counter items are placed together - "Lucky Dips", "Paper" and "Fags".

218 - Scrap of a Life

2005-10-11T17:32:00.000+01:00

"JOB SHIFTS" and "SWIFTS - DUST" are just about legible on this scrap, but whether this has anything to do with shopping I'm uncertain. I looks more like a scrap of paper referring to someone's work plans...so why was it in a shopping trolley?

217 - Emergency Windowlene

2005-10-11T16:54:00.000+01:00

Most emergency items I find on lists are alcoholic beverages. With this precedent having been set, I find emergency "Windowlene" particularly funny. Perhaps they like the particularly acidic aftertaste.

I'm not convinced that the emergency "Windowlene" has much to do with the Teddington and Hampton Music Festival, but it would be nice to think that it's possibly given out as a prize. I'm not sure what for, but it could be a nice prize anyway.

216 - Lottee's Additions

2005-10-11T16:49:00.000+01:00

I'm unsure as to whether the "Lottee" items are written by the same hand as the rest of the list. Certainly they are in a different pen, but I have the suspicion that the list was written in a black gel pen, and then "Lottee" added her items to the list later. I particularly like the vagueness of "Lottee Halloween outfit".

215 - Beef Stew For Six

2005-10-11T16:46:00.000+01:00

The grouped listing of a choice of beef cuts and some vegetables suggest the ingredients for a recipe of stew which, judging by the "x6." in the top left corner would suggest is to serve six people. It's probably not a bad guess on quantities, but I'd be worried about the intestinal effect of "12 button onions" on the poor diner.

"milk" clearly is not part of the recipe. I mean, it's set miles apart. It's so obvious it's a different item. Really. Besides, who would even consider putting milk in a stew? Only weirdos, that's who. (Cue people leaving comments about stews where milk is a standard ingredient).

214 - Tea For Who?

2005-10-11T16:42:00.000+01:00

Hmmm...three different teas suggest three different tea drinkers. However, I only say this because I drink "normal" tea and nothing else. It is quite possible that this shopper is simply a big fan of tea of different kinds, and wants a good range at home.

I also like the use of asterisks even though I don't know what they signify. The problem is that while most items are starred, some aren't: "Loo roll" (which certainly deseres a star, in my book) and "Herbals Tea" are left naked of stardom. Cat food is exctingly boxed as well, though. And has two stars. Evidently a special cat.

213 - EGGS and BACON

2005-09-29T18:53:00.000+01:00

There's something curious about people who use inconsistent capital letters. I don't mean people who don't start words with them, but rather people like this shopper who - for a reason known only to them - writes most items in lower case, but "EGGS" and "BACON" in upper case. I'd like to think it's something to do with a traditional Full English Breakfast, or that it's to differentiate quantities, but the sad fact remains that we'll struggle to find out.

However, the one item that grammatically demands capitalisation is left without: "dolmio". It's a brand name, and therefore a proper noun. It should read "Dolmio".

Do you think they'd notice if I used some Biro over the top of it?

212 - Thigh and Breast

2005-09-29T18:43:00.000+01:00

A lot of people buy chicken breast. A few buy thigh. I guess it all depends whether you're into leg or breast. But both? Well, that just strikes me as greedy, unfussy and - perhaps - a bit dangerous.

211 - The Shopper's Synod

2005-09-29T17:38:00.000+01:00

It's a great shame that I'm becoming more skilled at decifering dodgy handwriting. Why? Because I know that if I went on at length about "synods" - a council of a church, usually a Christian church, convened to decide an issue of doctrine or administration - I'd be simply falsifying a listed item. How, and why? Because it doesn't say "synod" after all. But just think how good it would be to have a council of shoppers, convened to decide a "shopper's doctrine". Oh, that'd be great!

Perhaps the synod could have taken place at the Holiday Inn. After all, the list is written on the back of what I presume is a Holiday Inn order pad, as it was found in a supermarket only a few hundred yards from one such hotel.

210 - Bath Puffs, But No Thank You

2005-09-29T17:30:00.000+01:00

The shopper is making a casserole. This is interesting to me, as we've begun cooking up massive stews ready to see us through the winter. However, I don't want any "bath puffs" to see me through the winter. Indeed, I'm not entirely sure what they are. They sound like those fizzy bath things that dissolve in water and make you gag with disgustingly floral odours. And I don't think they're anything to do with the Hunny Monster (and yes, I have spelt it correctly, according to Quaker Oats)...although you can never be sure.

Perhaps the sad fact that the Hunny Monster has no role to play in this shopper's list has forced them to withdraw the thank you suggested by "Thank You Cards" at the top of the second column. It's a shame.

No Shopping Lists at the Supermarket?

2005-09-25T13:23:00.000+01:00

Unbelievable...we've just got back from Tesco, and I found NO LISTS. Absolutely none. Zero. I looked in multiple trolley parks, and even the baskets.

I'm shocked.

I'm scared.

I think they're on to me.

Brewsters Millions

2005-09-22T22:02:00.000+01:00

Okay, so it's not a shopping list, but it's certainly shopping-esque.

A friend at work found this, discarded, at the side of a cash machine in Brewsters Taunton. This isn't anything spectacular in itself, but then again finding discarded shopping lists is hardly the most breathtaking event either.

But look at the amounts. Firstly who on earth withdraws £50 in cash at Brewsters, especially as they accept cards as payment? Secondly, who runs their current account at -£29,900.34? And, finally, who continues to have an available overdraft of £28,809.10?!

One of only two sensible conclusions can be drawn from this. The cash-withdrawer is absolutely loaded. OR the cash-withdrawer is a gangster.

I favour the second option. I also like the idea of collecting balance ledgers. It's even more voyeuristic than shopping lists...

209 - Frantic Scrawl Around £30 Cash

2005-09-17T13:03:00.000+01:00

Yep. It's frantic scrawl around a large circled "£30 cash". I'm quite sure that the placement of the scrawled reminders around the cash amount is some kind of code, but I'm uncertain what to.

"DVD School" may be a DVD of 'School of Rock', but I think this is unlikely. As a teacher, I reckon it's more likely to be a DVD to take into school and show the kids. Quite why, though, is a mystery.

Similarly, the top left corner is strange. "1 2 3 4 5 CURSS [something I can't read] 0 7 8 9 4". The second string of numbers looks like the first part of a mobile phone number. But why count in to cursing someone?

And is it a picnic that's coded at the bottom left? A mysterious list indeed...

208 - Cheesecake

2005-09-17T13:00:00.000+01:00

Every so often a list comes along that lists specific recipe items. This one is almost definitely for some kind of cheesecake. The first four items would definitely be used in making a base, while the next three make a bit of cheesy-filling stuff.

However, it is the bottom few shopping items that I'm not so sure about. As someone who's not a fan of cheesecake per se, I'm not entirely 'up' on potential toppings, but the precision of these items suggests it's legitimate.

Does anybody have any ideas what flavour this is going to emerge as?

207 - Furniture Restorer

2005-09-17T12:58:00.000+01:00

"SUGAR SOAP" and "WOOD WASH" suggest that somebody is planning a weekend of furniture restoring. It may, of course, be a weekend of sorting out the skirting boards for all I know, but the usage still stands.

Something on the list that scarily angered me was that "B D CARD" doesn't say who the card is for. This is a little nasty of me, I feel, as there are many people don't write who the items on their lists are for. Perhaps previous shoppers who have bought birthday cards have simply spoiled me into thinking that I'll find out every person's birthday. Either way, I feel guilty and shamed. But happy birthday anyway!

Accessory to Murder

2005-09-16T22:40:00.000+01:00

This is quite chilling. Jim recently found a collection of old forensic science journals from the 1950s, one of which featured the case of John George Haigh, otherwise known as The Acid Bath Vampire.

Excitingly for the Compendium, it turns out that one of the key pieces of evidence in the case against Haigh was a shopping list found in his hotel room. Although quite hard to make out from the scan, it features a range of items including:

H2SO4 (Sulphuric Acid)
Gloves
Apron
Rags

So, shopping lists have a sinister side...

206 - Tesco Stuffing Must Be Rubbish

2005-09-16T21:05:00.000+01:00

Well, it must be. You don't write "Paxo" (a brand of stuffing) on the back of a Tesco stuffing box unless the aforementioned Tesco stuffing has been somewhat disappointing.

Then again, can one trust a shopper who wants "BlueSpray"? It may be paint, but I doubt it. Hair colouring? Perhaps.

205 - Fruit Salad

2005-09-16T21:03:00.000+01:00

It might not be for a fruit salad, of course, but if this fruit isn't destined for such a dish one can only assume it's for a very fancy fruit bowl. Or a fetching hat.

At least the fruit lover has a social conscience, though. Going along to the Decent Home Workshop surely requires a certain kidn of attitude. Funnily enough, we received a flyer for solar energy installation a couple of days ago. It looks great. I'd like to do it. Sadly, though, we live in a rented flat and I doubt the landlord would be very impressed to return to find a couple of massive solar panels and accompanying batteries stuck on the roof..

204 - Tins Plum Easy Husay

2005-09-16T19:56:00.000+01:00

As with a few of my lists, it's opposite side that is of most interest. Indeed, the list itself on is just a bit illegible, presenting as it does "TINS PLUM EASY HUSAY". Any ideas?

The reverse side of the list, however, offers an astounding insight into the life of the shopper. I have disguised the personal details to protect the shopper's identity...not that they probably know that they're on here. Then again, why write a list on the back of this letter - and leave it in yoru trolley at the end of the trip - if you're bothered about privacy? I guess one suggestion is that the shopper has their midn on other things. Either way, I hope her husband's discharge from Emberbrook goes smoothly...as does the "care manager".

203 - Wife Lunch

2005-09-16T19:49:00.000+01:00

It's a shame that what, on first glance, says "wife lunch" actually says "w/e lunch". I was truly depressed at this revelation, as the former option is just so much funnier.

The question is whether "sliced ham" and "salad leaves" are part the "w/e lunch" or whether they're different. Personally, I often have a light sald-esque meal at weekend lunch times, but perhaps this shopper doesn't.

202 - Etc.

2005-09-16T19:45:00.000+01:00

"Etc." And so on. You know, bathroom wares, etc. And "ham and cheese" (presumably sandwich fillings), etc.

Fair enough.

However, why didn't they say "dinner, etc." rather than "dinner tonight" and "dinner tomorrow"?

The Guardian's "The Guide" Features the Compendium

2005-09-10T20:14:00.000+01:00

Today I had a very nice surprise, and a damned good giggle. On opening The Guide, the magazine that comes with The Guardian on Saturday, I saw the Compendium staring straight out at me. Even better, Johnny Dee who wrote the review of the site, is actually quite complimentary!

"Who would have thought a site that contains scans and commentaries on 200 discarded shopping lists could be so addictive? ...Honestly, it's fascinating."

That is, without a shadow of a doubt, one of the coolest things I've seen in a while.

201 - A Busy Weekend Ahead

2005-09-10T15:04:00.000+01:00

There is little doubt that the shopper has a hectic weekend planned - but how are they goign to remember it all if they leave their list behind? The "shears" complement that instruction to "cut hedges", presumably to prepare for a garden party. The "pots & flowers" will decorate the aforementioned garden, with shade provided by the "parasol". Some varieties of booze must have been procurred from elsewhere, as only "pimms" is listed here along with containers - "jug for pimms" and "Bucket - Booze". I'd guess that the top section is for a buffet part of the garden party meal, with the bottom third being ingredients for a curry as the main course. No dessert though...